5. Inspiration – 3 books about coaching and for coaches

Updated: Nov 3, 2021

Some books leave us free and some books make us free” -- Ralph Waldo Emerson

1. Book: Conversational Intelligence: How Great Leaders Build Trust & Get Extraordinary Results by Judith E. Glaser

Opening remarks

This book really brought me luck. In 2017, I was at the EMEA PMI conference in Rome. I was inspired by a lecture by Phil Bristol - a former Ranger and currently a top project consultant and coach in his company on "We Need to Talk - Feedback that doesn't have hurt". I was so interested in the topic that I followed in the footsteps of resources and completed similar training as Phil. One key reference was to the work of Judit E. Glaiser. It was the best coincidence in my life. Unfortunately, I won't see Judith live anymore, but her book has taken me light years forward.

About the Book (excerpt from apple books)

The key to success in life and business is to become a master at Conversational Intelligence. It's not about how smart you are, but how open you are to learn new and effective powerful conversational rituals that prime the brain for trust, partnership, and mutual success. Conversational Intelligence translates the wealth of new insights coming out of neuroscience from across the globe, and brings the science down to earth so people can understand and apply it in their everyday lives. Author Judith Glaser presents a framework for knowing what kind of conversations trigger the lower, more primitive brain; and what activates higher-level intelligences such as trust, integrity, empathy, and good judgment. Conversational Intelligence makes complex scientific material simple to understand and apply through a wealth of easy-to-use tools, examples, conversational rituals, and practices for all levels of an organization.

The book has 3 parts and 12 chapters:

PART I Conversational Intelligence and Why We Need It

PART II Raising Your Conversational Intelligence

PART III Getting to the Next Level of Greatness

Interesting insights

For me personally, the most interesting chapters and information that I have incorporated into my practice are the following:

  1. Applying the TRUST model to everyday life and application of the 5 steps that help you to reach it.

  2. Shifting from I to We. How to make TRUST (Transparency, Relationship, Understanding, Shared Success, Testing Assumptions) shift that we have to bridge from I to We

  3. Five Conversational Blind Spots

  4. Five questions from Protect…. Partner

  5. The Heart Brain

  6. Sideline Signals from the amygdala

  7. Trust and Distrust

  8. Ladder of Conclusions

  9. Listening for threats

  10. Vital instincts: Forces

  11. The Road Map for Building Conversational Agility

  12. Conversational Rituals for Change

  13. Working with exercises (Double – Clicking, LEARN, Back to the Future)

What makes a book good?

Thanks to this book, I realized how sensitive our brain is and how incredibly little is enough to activate fight to flight mode. This book is excellent not only for coaches, but for anyone on this planet who communicates with human beings. What is described in the book really works, these are clear rules that everyone can master.

What is the shortcoming of the book?

I did not find anything I could comment on.

2. Book: Coach the Person, Not the Problem: A Guide to Using Reflective Inquiry by Marcia Reynolds